Am I the Tie That Binds?

I was all set to site down and write a blog post about swim diapers. After the “Poo in the Pool” fiasco of Memorial Day during which our local pool was closed for an hour, in 90 plus degree weather, due to an unfortunate disposable swim diaper that did not work, I was fired up and ready to write. Just buy a reusuable swim diaper. Imse Vimse are good. They work. They don’t inconvenience your neighbors. They are cheaper in the long run and better for the environment. Plus, they are cute! I had it all planned out. Then, I sat down and read the Sunday NYT Styles section…..

In the Sunday NYT section, tucked away behind an article on the gorgeous, classy Iman, the Gore’s marriage implosion, and the tall lady from Glee marrying a woman from my alma mater, was an article about a French Intellectual (their term, not mine) who opines that some of the tools of motherhood that I espouse, cloth diapers, breastfeeding, natural childbirth, are just chains that are keeping women from achieving their full potential. Elisabeth Badinter, as she outlines in Conflict: The Woman and the Mother (Le Conflit: la femme et la mere) believes that the advances of modern times, disposable diapers, the plastic (now BPA-free glass) bottle and epidurals which were designed to help free women and keep them independent and liberated are being discarded in favor of greener, more eco-friendly, and she would say, harder choices. Choices that are rolling back years of feminist advances in favor of a lifestyle that chains women to motherhood.

So, as you can see, not what I wanted to read on a happy, peaceful, Sunday morning. Mommy Wars a la Francais. Unlike the US based Mommy Wars which seem to focus mostly on the Working Mom vs. Stay at Home Mom dynamic, this was all about the movement toward a greener, cleaner lifestyle. She classifies the heightened eco-awareness amongst many of today’s moms (and dads!) as just a passing fad and one, that left unchecked, is going to derail decades of advances for women.

After I got over my initial anger and frustration at what I believe to be this woman’s limited point of view, I guess I understood a bit of what she was saying. Yes, women are making different choices than perhaps their mothers would have made. I can see how the women who blazed the trail for working women (moms or not) would be upset or frustrated that so many who follow are choosing different paths and perhaps not fully appreciating their struggles and sacrifices. But, isn’t this okay? Isnt the beauty of where we are in society that it is okay that we have a choice? Bottles might allow women to return to work sooner but breastfeeding is cheaper and easier for many (not all, as my own experience would attest). Cloth diapers are better for the environment and our pocket books. So many live their lives in a medicated state, isn’t it okay and rather cool that some (once again, not all, as my crash C-section would attest) choose to experience a major life event drug free and clear? Why are these things bad?

I do agree somewhat with one point she makes. That we, as a society, have idealized what the “perfect” mom does (cloth, breastfeed for 12 months or more, natural childbirth) and those who opt to not do these things or, even worse, try and cannot succeed in doing these things are left feeling like a failure. As if they did not check off all the “Good Mommy” boxes and are not as dedicated as the moms who do. So, what do you think? Are women who choose cloth and breastfeeding and natural childbirth rolling back decades of feminist advances? By making these choices are we reducing our freedom and limiting our professional options? Are the women who choose to not incorporate these elements into their parenting portfolio “Imperfect?” Or, in the end, is the “Perfect” mom one who loves her child and does the best she can in her own individual way taking into account her own, individual circumstances?

A pretty pocket diaper

Pocket diapers seem to be all the rage these days.  Pocket Cloth Diapers are cloth diapers that have a waterproof outer with a soft inner that wicks moisture away from babies skin.  There is a “pocket” opening where you place a pocket insert or something absorbent.  Pocket diapers will not function without an insert or some kind of pocket stuffer.  Some people have found that prefold diapers make wonderful pocket inserts.  They are economical and superbly absorbent.  They may increase bulk, though, so this depends on your personal tastes.

There are many choices in pocket cloth diapers.  Among our favorites are the following:

bumGenius 3.0

bumGenius in Grasshopper

The bumGenius 3.0 is the work horse of the pocket diaper category.  The best selling bum Genius 3.0s have a waterproof exterior, a soft, non-piling inner, natural gussets which contain even the gnarliest messes and stretch to fit tabs just like the disposables have.  They come in wonderful colors and are great all-around diapers.

Fuzzi Bunz

Fire Engine Red Fuzzi Bunz

Fuzzi Bunz makes a terrific pocket diaper.  It has a super absobent insert, a soft fleece layer, adjustable snaps, stretchy leg elastic and a soft waterproof exterior.  The Fuzzi Bunz comes in multiple sizes as well as one size allowing you to find the perfect option for your child.  In addition Fuzzi Bunz are offered in a vast array of colors from gorgeous pastels to vibrant bold hues.

Rocky Mountain Diapers

Rocky Mountain Diaper in Berry and Lime

Rocky Mountain Diapers are wonderful pocket diapers proudly made in the USA.   Rocky Mountain Diapers innovation is an internal adjustment system that allows for a trim fit tailored to each child’s body type.  This system is similar to that of children’s waist bands in their jeans.  There is soft suede on the inside next to baby’s skin and fade resistant PUL on the outside to keep them waterproof.  The sizing adjustments allow parents to use the same diaper from newborn to potty learning.

Happy Heinys Pocket Diaper

Happy Heiny's in Cow Print

Happy Heinys Pocket Diapers use only custom milled fleece. There are no leg casings which allow for better fitting diapers and contain messes better without leaving red marks.  The Diapers are available in a variety or solid colors and fun prints.  These diapers have been tested for 12 hours or more at night with absolutely no wicking for most babies.

Thirsties Duo Diaper

Duo Diaper in Mango

A recent entry into the Pocket Diaper category is the Duo Diaper from Thirsties.  This diaper copies the technology of Thirsties best selling Duo Wrap diaper cover.  This diaper’s fit technology is such that two sizes should take the average family from newborn to potty learning.  Like its competitors, the Duo Diaper combines a waterproof outer with a soft and absorbent inner.  These diapers have a microfiber terry and hemp combo insert amounting to 7 layers in all.  Like other Thirsties products, these diapers come in simply spectacular colors and are made in the USA.

These are all wonderful diapers that are welcome additions to any cloth diapering parent’s stash.  All can be purchased at Cottontail Baby an online natural parenting store run by a committed to organics and all things natural WAHM.